House MD Episodes: Season 5 #507 "The Itch"

Broadcast:: November 11, 2008
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Written by: Peter Blake
Directed by: Greg Yaitanes
Music
Timeline: A day after the last episode ("Joy") ends.
Patient of the Week:: Stewart has agoraphobia --- he hasn't left his home since he and his girlfriend were mugged and she was killed seven years ago.
How House gets involved:: Cameron had made a house call to him some time ago and when she discovers he has had several seizures, she takes the case to House.
The privacy invasion / ethical breach: They tell the patient they will operate on him in his home but when they have him unconscious, they take him to the hospital.
Preliminary diagnoses:: Coming Soon
The final diagnosis: Lead poisoning caused by tiny fragments of the bullet that entered his body during the mugging and they are dissolving. House removes the fragments immediately.
Clinic Patient: None
Additional Information

Cameron (Jennifer Morrison), Foreman (Omar Epps) and the team find a way to treat an agoraphobic patient who is sick and refuses to come to the hospital for care in the HOUSE episode "The Itch" airing Tuesday, Nov. 11 (8-9 PM ET/PT) on FOX.
Š2008 FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
Credit: Adam Taylor/FOX

Cast: Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House; Lisa Edelstein as Dr. Lisa Cuddy; Omar Epps as Dr. Eric Foreman; Robert Sean Leonard as Dr. James Wilson; Jennifer Morrison as Dr. Allison Cameron; Jesse Spencer as Dr. Robert Chase; Peter Jacobson as Dr. Chris Taub; Kal Penn as Dr. Lawrence Kutner; Olivia Wilde as Thirteen

Guest Cast: Jennifer Crystal Foley as Rachel Taub; Todd Louiso as Nozick; Marcus Eley as Larry Ruseckas; Yoyao Hsueh as EMT; Jack J. Bennett as Fireman; P.J. Griffith as Frank; Frank Nobel as Hal; Diarra Kilpatrick as Sally; Kelly Michaels as Guy; Bobbin Bergstrom as Nurse

Quotations, Quotes, Dialogue, Scenes:

Cuddy goes to House and says, "Last night—"
He interrupts saying,"Forget it."
"I know this is ackward but we need to talk."
"There's a reason that we've evolved a feeling of awkwardness. It tells us not to talk about things."
"I was emotional because of the adoption falling through, and you actually let your human side show for a moment. That is why we kissed. I just want to say 'Thank you' for not taking advantage."
House nods curtly, "You're welcome. Any time you want to stop kissing, I'm there for you."
Wilson goes to see House, "Did you speak to Cuddy last night?'
"She's fine. Why would it take anyone more than a few hours to get over misplacing a baby?"
"You spoke to her?"
House uses the exact same line he used on his team to throw them off the scent (who ever expects the truth from House?), "Kinda hit that so she's all on my jock."
But Wilson immediately believes him and is staggered. "Whoa. What?"
House finds it interesting. "Huh. Everyone else thought I was kidding."
"You hit? Like making out or full-on-sex or—"
"Got a chart laid out with all the bases, and I'll take you through it."
"Wh-What are you gonna do?"
"What can I do? I'm going to ignore her for the rest of my life." He directs his attention to his hand. "This mosquito bite kept me awake."
"Don't care about the bug bite. She's your boss."
"So, now I have two reasons to ignore her." Wilson looks at him and House finally tells him, "It was just a kiss."
"There's a reason—"
"Yes those large things in her bra."
"—you were hiding it from me. Means it meant something to you."
"Yeah, I fiendishly concealed it within the phrase, 'I hit that'."
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Later while on the phone with the new team and Cameron, House intersperses personal questions to Cameron, "Cameron, you engaged to Chase, yet?"
Thirteen interrupts, "Sorry, we should have clarified, we are calling about the patient, not Dr. Cameron's love life."
But Cameron answers the question, "We aren't engaged." Then she explains to Thirteen, "It moves things along much faster to just give him the answer."
After a little about the patient, House returns to the answer, "After six years?"
"...a year and a half...."
"You living together?"
"We spend most nights together."
"...His place or yours?"
"His usually."
"Interesting."
"You would have said interesting no matter what the answer."
"And no matter what the answer, it would have been interesting."
"No engagement: commitment issues. His place: control issues. Not sure whose but interesting."
Thirteen isn't the only one bored but she is the one who says sarcastically, "Yeah, moves much faster this way."
Wilson joins Cuddy in the cafeteria after he asks about how she is dealing, she figures out that he knows and they talk about the kiss and she tells him, "It's no big deal. I was feeling vulnerable. He's a friend. And I leaned on him."
"It's funny. I've leaned on friends in the past. Never leaned so far my tongue fell into their mouth."
"I don't think of House that way. I never have."
"Why not?
"Well, you know exactly how it would go. It'd start off exciting. We'd get caught up in the novelty and the hostility and the forbiddenness and then realise that the flirty hostility is just hostility and his inability to open up is no longer exiting it's just frustrating. And -- and then its's the inevitable blowup and the recriminations and we don't talk for two months."
Wilson takes this in and says, "Yeah. Well, it certainly proves you've never thought about House that way."
Cuddy is annoyed."I get your point. I will be more careful with my tongue in the future."
"That's not my point. Maybe novelty and hostility and forbidenness doesn't have to end bad."
Later Wilson tells House, "You are scared to get involved."
"How is that scared? It's rational. Emotionally mature people who work together should not date. Guaranteed breakup. Guaranteed ugliness."
"Any relationship that doesn't end in a breakup ends in death. Everything falls apart in the end. That's your world view. The corollary which you keep forgetting is that you have to grab any chance for happiness."
"Why does this matter so much to you? Cuddy and I are fine. The only person getting worked up here is you."
"I don't want you to be fine, I want you to be happy. I think if you dated her—"
"Are you familiar with the adverb 'vicariously'?
"If I wanted to ask her out—"
"You did ask her out, last year, what happened there?"
"I don't know. I wasn't interested."
"Wrong. You were interested. But Amber grabbed your genitals first. And now you're single and that makes you miserable because you think it's too soon for another relationship so you're gonna make me miserable. Pleas For me.e get a girlfriend, a life or something."
Wilson goes to Cuddy with this and tells her, "I do have, I've always had some feelings for you."
"Are you saying you want to date me?"
"No, I-I it wouldn't be fair to House and its too soon after Amber."
"But you thought you should just say it."
"I thought you should know."
"Let's have dinner tomorrow night."
"Okay."
"Or maybe it would be better if we just had sex."
"Pardon me?"
"In front of House's office. I mean I don't want to take any chances. I assume the point of this is to make him jealous and make him realize that he does want a relationship with me?"
"Yes. You think it will work?"
"You're an idiot. Trust me. Everybody will be happier if House and me are not dating."
Meanwhile Chase and Cameron are also having trouble. Cameron asks Chase to do an operation that he claims she knew he would have to say no to. "You just wanted a season to be angry at me. If there's something wrong between us, then... You know why we spend nights at my house? Because when we spend them at yours I could tell you didn't want me there."
"Why would I keep inviting you over if I didn't want you there?"
"You always kicked me out every morning. You never offered me a drawer, you never cleared out your closet for me, I was just a visitor."
"How long have you felt like this?"
"From the start. I know its hard for you because you lost your husband, but I can't keep chasing you forever."

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Episodes :: #507 "The Itch"